actually, i love you, so you cannot be ugly to me. sometimes i think i have no idea what you actually look like. i know we’ve been friends for like a while but if someone asked oh who’s that i’d talk about how funny you are, how charming. about how i have watched you grow as a person, about how you often choose kindness where i would honestly choose a feral violence. i know you keep a tally of your mistakes and they run around your brain - but in mine? i think they never even make it past the front gate. when i think of you my heart swells up with all the weird shit we’ve done together and how you’ve talked me through heartbreak and how i’ve held your hair back and how we both are like, in therapy, and totally above gossiping, but also like, are going to spill the work tea.
i know! i know you feel ugly. i know you hate that you show symptoms, that you’re not normal. you said once - i’m afraid to show others the real me. but i see the other things - about these little quirks that are so, so endearing to me. how you are gentle to strangers. how you stand by your friends. how comfortable you make everybody. how you say hey, did you get home safe? even when it’s like 6 feet i’m walking.
i love you. yesterday you spent an hour liveblogging the episode of owl house that you’re on and i was like - this person is so fucking amazing. last night you said sorry for infodumping. as if you have anything to apologize for. as if part of the reason we’re friends is because i love it when you do this, i love listening. i love you, idiot. i love you so fucking much. i want to stick you in a cage so you stop getting random injuries. i want to throw you into a garbage disposal every time you send me that one specific meme. i love you, i love you, i love you. you mean absolutely everything to me.
okay yes it’s often bad and hard and sometimes i am so anxious my whole body feels like it’s vibrating but also at the same time the gps took me a different way on my drive and i got to see more of the river than i usually do and yesterday the sun was still above the horizon after 7pm and that was amazing and the whole sky turned an orange-gold like how they try to make ice cream taste; you know, one of those evenings that just tears you open no matter how jaded you get. it’s warm for the first time here and people had lined up against the water just to stand outside and watch the sunset
and yeah it’s tax season no i haven’t done mine yet but when i mentioned it offhand in a single side-comment three days later my friend sent me a list of helpful tips and followed up to see if i’d need help on them
there’s this parking lot for a walking trail near where i live and one of the two google reviews is my actual favorite: love it here. there were so many beautiful parking spots but sadly we could only take one. and no this person isn’t going to go viral and probably the only people navigating to this spot are extremely local - but there’s something so precious to me about someone taking the time to write something that will make strangers in their community laugh, even though there’s no way for me to tell them good one! directly
yes i am not doing well sometimes i’m doing even very-badly but recently i have been given enough breathing room to say okay, this situation is bad, but then it will be over, and you will be moving onto the next thing and it’s true that i need to get groceries and pay rent and argue with my health insurance but it is also true that in the absolute stress and anarchy of my life today someone recognized my dog before they recognized me and was so excited because “they tell everyone about the greyhound in the area and didn’t get a picture before so can they take a picture now please”
in class we all stand in a circle and are all grown adults and for a moment while the teacher is figuring something out, we all hold hands, just to be silly and connected. for no reason at all at 8pm on a thursday my friends and i start breaking out the dance moves to high school musical. my coworker gchats me during a meeting about the book he recommended to me and i’m enjoying reading
i help a high school set up for a star-themed dance and while putting up streamers i find graffiti that says if you’re reading this, i love you, and we’re both going to get out of here right next to fuck everyone, live out of spite, don’t let the fuckers make you die. on the bridge where i walk my dog someone has written i love you and on the sidewalk in chalk someone has written i love you and on the side of the water tower someone has written i love you
at the bottom of a text post an internet poet says - i love you, i love you, i love you. i’ve never met you, i love you because you exist and we exist together. and isnt that enough for now. just for this moment, i mean. like, if you just close your eyes and breathe - somewhere, across this world, i love you, because you’re here with me.
I love when people are excited over the small things in life. I’m so happy you got that plushie you wanted. I adore that you got a cool yo-yo. I’m proud of you for finding joy in a new hobby. Keep enjoying life!
If you are on Medicaid in the US you probably have not had to renew your coverage since March of 2020.
You WILL have to renew this year. The first renewal packets are getting sent out this month (March 2023). If you do not respond to them your Medicaid coverage will be terminated.
If your coverage is terminated, you have 90 days to appeal before you need to start the whole application process over again.
Please watch for this packet and fill it out if you get it! Don’t lose your coverage!
lmao we have finally reached a point where my PI is actively encouraging me to look at PhD programmes for the 2024 intake. it’s not the end of the world (I think it would be good for my health to rest) but still :/
I don’t know what happened for things to go from “I’ll introduce you to my friends and family” to “we should go on dates and fuck when we’re in the same city” lol
Not to sound delusional (I don’t think I’m being delusional) but what in the fuck happened and why do I care
